Life and Death

Yesterday was my birthday. It was an OK day - nothing too exciting or out of the ordinary - though I got some nice messages on the phone by friends and family singing Happy Birthday. Thank you Uncle Art and Aunt Judy and thank you Mike and Mandy for that.

We went to the Bonefish Grill for dinner and as always, it was a really pleasant night with some really good Sangria.

It is strange sitting here now... to know how old I am and where my life has gone. I am determined to do things this year to start the next phase of my life and to make it something more. I have so much more in me than this! I can't lose my determination and dreams.

It is also difficult to sit here and think about those I have lost this year. A few days ago, another of my Aunts passed away. That will be three Aunts and an Uncle I have lost in one year, not counting the cousins of which I believe there were 2 or 3. All of them were from my Father's side of the family. He now only has one brother alive and that one is not in good health. This is the difficulty of being the youngest in a large family. And I know one day I may have to deal with this as well, being the youngest in my family. It is strange to know, that when I go overseas again, I will not see the faces I have always seen... the smiles I knew, feel the hugs or kisses that I once did. I try not to think about it too much because it would get overwhelming I think. Its just strange and sad.

With the new year, I know there will be other losses, but I know there will be new things... New challenges, opportunities and chances. I guess while I always resented having my birthday at the end of the year (it usually gets lost amid Chanukah, Christmas, New Years), this year I don't feel that way. It sort of wraps up 2008 for me in a good way and sets me up for 2009 and what is to come. Its been a rough couple of years and I'm ready for good things.

So... Happy New Year everyone. May 2009 be one of health, love, prosperity and creativity for all of us.

Leopard ate my Tiger!

Yeah, as usual, it has been forever since I posted. Sorry. Life eats me and then spits me out. I don't mean to let these things wither. I am going to try and be better about it as I once again get my life together.

As Pooka asked for my Leopard disc for Mac, I figured I better actual install it on my iMac before I mailed it out. As a precaution for this whole event, I got an external hard drive to load my files on to (horror stories of crashed systems also encouraged me as I didn't want to be one of those people with good intention... that were a day late). Before installing, I did a last check of files and things and put those onto my external drive... My friend Dave randomly came over in a fit of serendipity right before I started. I disconnected the external drive from the iMac.

I put in the disc and started installing.... all was good. We were going to archive and update. Things went fine till the system was going to the desktop. The beachball of doom wouldn't go away... 15 minutes... We disconnected all periferals thinking that was causing problems and restarted. Still no go.. beachball of doom remained. We tried to re-install and just upgrade... No use. After a few attempts at circumventing said beachball.... we were left with one last option. Overwriting everything. Meaning, losing EVERYTHING on the iMac and restarting from scratch... At this point, I didn't have a choice.

So... we did it. I died a little inside but was thankful I had saved important files (like artwork!!!!) on my external drive. I did lose all my bookmarks and a few random 'loose' files no in folders.... but it worked. Then it was hours of trying to reload in all my software and reconnecting periferals again. Some applications wouldn't load and we had to make repeated attempts. I don't know if it was the computer or the discs. Still don't know.. But everything seemed to have finally loaded and updated, upgraded and finished.

I'm EXTREMELY unhappy about how Leopard humped my iMac like that... For what I got (Time Machine and 'Stacks') I could have done without it. I just assumed (mistake) that it was the right thing to do... You know... get an upgrade and load it to make things better... I could have stuck it out with Tiger. It worked fine. But what's done is done. What I lost from the old system is gone and it was nothing too important I think. I don't know - I didn't keep track.

There is an upside to all of this. That is the fact that I have essentially a clean slate on my computer. I had tons of things on it that didn't need to be there. Icons all over my desktop and clutter clutter clutter. That's gone and I think its a good thing because I need to unclutter and better organise my life. I tend to be a horder (nothing to with WoW mind you) and keep things because maybe I might use it later or maybe its important. I have to let things go.

So in that theme, my computer is now... clean and organized. Now for the rest of me and my life.

Balticon and upcoming cons

Balticon was... at the very least...  disappointing for me.  It didn't seem like there was that many attendees and they certainly weren't spending any money.  I know, that sounds cold, but I make a living selling art, so if it doesn't sell that sort of works against me.  The starving artist thing is a romantic idea and all, but really, isn't all that glamorous a lifestyle.  Trust me.

Anyway, this was a large disappointment because I'd gotten the paintings I'd done framed and they looked good and seemed to get some good response, but no one bought any of them.  Not one.  Granted, the art show over all was pretty sad with very few purchases, but that isn't much of a consolation.  I will say that I did learn that I should have had a quick sale price so as to give people on the one day attending pass a chance to buy something if they wanted it.  But oh well...  

The table sales were also pretty sad.  I BARELY covered the hotel cost and didn't walk away with much at all when all was said and done.  The highlight of the trip was seeing Pooka and Five-Foot-Mayhem there and being able to hang out at Outback for dinner.  It made me realize how much I miss my friends and hanging out with them.  

I will not be attending Balticon next year but mostly due to there being a rather special occasion that I would not miss for the world!  Which would be Pooka and Five-Foot-Mayhem's wedding!  But with the show as it was, I would not be going anyway.  With the market as it is and buyers being... well... being what they are... it is not an expense I can afford.  I did talk to some high up staff and gave them some ideas and things they could and should do to hype up not only the art show and artist alley (and do a better job with them) but to get the convention up and exciting.  The biggest issue seems to be with people having the 'this is how we've always done it' attitude and not adjusting to changing times, attendees and trends.  

I spent a day at Wizard World Con in Philly.  Wow.. that is just one huge honking dealer's room.  The tables in their artist alley were like, $600 or something.  No way I was going to shell out that kind of money on an iffy situation.  Walking through the artist alley, I was glad I only paid for the day cost...  Didn't look like there was much money being made there.  Most of the money was in the comic books and collectibles.  Though, that kind of artist alley is more for connections and showing off your stuff I guess.  I did see the Iron Sheik.  He was doing an interview with a radio station.  That man is just... batshit crazy.  There were a few other wrestlers and one or two tv personalities, but mostly it was about the comic books - the artists and the writers.  It did make me think about doing my comic book and getting back to my roots.  

*sigh*  So many ideas and things and not enough time or hands to do them all.

I saw the Indiana Jones movie... It was ok.  That's all I'm going to say about it.  

Right now, I'm preparing for two shows coming up.  Anime MidAtlantic and the following weekend, AnimeNext.  Having back to back shows is difficult but we'll see how it goes.  I'm hoping I can make some sales and do well there, as well as get some new fans as these are two shows I don't usually attend.  This is only my second time for both.  The response last year was positive so here's hoping that continues.

Narnia and Paintings

Yesterday, I saw the new Narnia movie. It was very beautifully shot and very enjoyable to watch. It is actually much darker than the first movie and focuses much more on war and political intrigue. The four children have grown up a bit and each has been affected by their first trip to Narnia... Peter, the eldest, after a year, seems angry and bitter that he is now a child again, when once he was an adult and the High King of Narnia. Susan has pulled away from other people and would rather be alone. The actor who plays Prince Caspian is... well... VERY attractive and lovely to look at and he can act! Which is of course a plus. The visual effects were wonderful, the costuming and all were very real feeling (done by WETA). They showed a lot of the ruins of the previous Narnia and I wished they had perhaps... done a little flashback of some sort to remind us what it was.... like the castle the Kings and Queens had once lived in... As I haven't seen the first in a long time. But other than that, it was a good movie... 2 hours though it wasn't too bad to sit through. And of course, you have Eddie Izzard as Reepicheep, so how can you go wrong?

Its A Polar Bear!

Hey, there's another painting!  Decided to do an animal painting this time and for some reason thought a polar bear would be interesting because of the white and trying to get the subtle differences in the fur.  It wasn't easy and I realized that animals aren't easy to do with oil paints!  Still, he didn't come out too bad did he?  I like his eyes.  So yeah... still trying to keep up with the painting and get a better handle on it before starting a commission for a good friend of mine. 

Did a double header at the movies yesterday and saw "Speed Racer" and "Iron Man".  Both were fun movies to watch but weren't of the same caliber.  "Speed Racer" is a lot of fun.  Don't expect deep plots, or characters or great meaning in any of it.  Its just a fun ride with pretty colors.  Just hope you don't have an epileptic fit from the flashing lights and colors.  It did actually have a little message about corporate sponsors involved in sports and car racing in particular, but it really did keep to the basic idea of watching Speed race his little heart out because, after all, that's the only thing he knows how to do.  I did see some reviewer say it wasn't good, but really, what did you expect if you have EVER seen the original cartoon?  I mean, the kid's name is Speed... its not a nickname.... Its his actual name.  And he has a little brother named Spritle.  So just relax, go see the movie and have fun.  Go for the experience of it all.

"Iron Man" was different.  It was fun and exciting and had great visuals but it was a good movie.  The caliber of acting was also on a different level and there was some deeper story which also tied into current events without being preachy or taking any real political sides.  Robert Downey Jr. was an excellent choice to play Tony Stark, the playboy with more money than he knows what do to with.  Both Stark and Downey are talented and gifted in their fields, but both have the past life of wine women and song so to speak.  It really just came together well, with likable and interesting characters and of course, the cool costume for Iron Man.  If you have to choose between "Speed Racer" and "Iron Man", I'd definitely choose the latter.  It had a great story, great characters and was a great fun movie all around.

*Runs in.... trips*

Hey, well.... long time.  Sorry.  After the trip visiting my brother I got into a lot of different things.  One of which was playing World of Warcraft again (finally got my Night Elf Rogue to 70!).  If you've never played you don't really know how much like crack that game is.  But I did reconnect with some friends which was great.  

The visit with my brother was lovely.  It was wonderful to see the kids who are so much older and bigger now!  My ten year old niece is only a little bit shorter than me!  She just shot right up!  They all have personalities now and are really blossoming into little people.  

While I was away, I made some good decisions concerning my life and the general direction of my art and career.  One decision was to not attend Dragon*Con this year.  This was difficult, but the trip and convention is costly...  With the economy how it is, there is less of a guarantee of a successful show than previous years.  I had to weigh my current state of finances with what might happen and chose to pass on the convention for this year.  We'll see how things are next year.  I am sad not to go, but felt it was the right choice to make.  

I am oddly inspired and uninspired to paint right now.  I have ideas but it is being difficult to sit down and do them.  Some seem to be oil paints, but I'm not sure how to execute them.  I think that might be blocking me from moving forward.  

Other than that, I have to move on some decisions I made and make them happen.  I will of course, let you know how that all goes.  No, I'm not trying to be mysterious, that is just a fun byproduct :D

The Emerald City

So, I'm leaving in about a half hour for the airport to head over to Kansas City to visit my brother and his family for a week.  I'll still be posting but can't promise much to say that will relate to art things.  I'll have a sketch book with me and some drawing supplies, but I don't think I'll have much time to do anything more than draw a little. 

I'm looking forward to getting away from J-town - which has put in some new parking rules, making it just about impossible for me to park the car anywhere.  I would get a residence parking permit, BUT as I don't live on the residence streets (I live in an apartment on the main street), they won't issue me one.  So I had to place a formal complaint and I'll have to attend some town meeting to get my voice heard.  It is absolutely ridiculous.  I won't get started on my visit to the borough office to discuss this issue.

Ah well, away from stupid J-town and stressful work to visit family.  Shouldn't be stressful... right?  :D